Just because you’re paranoid doesn’t mean you’re wrong

The government is after me … and you

by Patricia Lewis

There’s an old saying that goes, “Just because you’re paranoid doesn’t mean you’re wrong.” Lately I’ve taken that as my personal motto.

That’s because everything about our government seems designed to make me feel paranoid. They want my guns. They want my money. They want to dictate my lighting options. They want to microchip my livestock. If I attend a tea party protesting our trillions in deficit spending, or if I am against abortion, or if I object to illegal immigration, I’m lumped with terrorists. If I stare at a man dressed in drag – even though he’s dressed in drag in order to be stared at – I’m guilty of a “hate” crime.

So what’s a paranoid housewife to do?

“Is it just me,” inquired my oldest daughter a few months ago, “or are things getting crazier and crazier?”

“It’s not just you,” I replied. “They are getting crazier.”

And it gets nuttier every day. Our government is kicking our economy in the tush and encouraging it to tank by spending trillions it doesn’t have. It says offering cash for clunkers will save our economy. It wants to take over health insurance, assuring us that it’s a “right.” (Documentation please!) It is spending trillions of dollars on certifiably idiotic ideas such as government-run “private” businesses and government-run health care and government-run schools. It wants to impose harsh restrictions that will close thousands of small businesses. It wants to take over my health insurance. It wants my personal information. It wants to restrict my ability to raise my children as I see fit. It wants to know how many toilets I have in my house, how long it takes me to get to work, and what my mental condition might be (hint: mistrustful). Now tell me, does any of this strike you as ominous?

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